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A QUESTION OF BALANCE by Jeff Michaels
Do you want a balanced life?
Of course the answer for most people is an unqualified YES! What we may not be able to qualify is what “a balanced life” actually is. In the book “The Art of Peace”, the author states that there are;
“Eight forces that sustain creation;
Movement and stillness,
Solidification and fluidity,
Extension and contraction,
Unification and division.”
In our personal quest for a fulfilling, peaceful, balanced life we may recognize these forces at work. They are not just physical, but also act in mental, emotional and spiritual ways. In each situation we are looking for balance and peace. It may be interesting to add two more forces in the goal of balancing our lives, Question and Answer.
The trick to gaining or retaining balance is knowing where you are right now, in the here and now. This requires us to make an honest self-assessment if we are going to improve our position in life. Questions will help in this regard. Answers will guide you on your path.
First ask “Who am I now?” “Where am I now?” and “What am I now?” Forget the why, how and when aspects. It is not that those questions are unimportant. They can distract you from the important “Here and Now” aspect of finding balance. It is not as important how, when or why you got to this point, it is important where, what and especially who you are right now.
If you are not where, what and who you want to be at this very moment, that’s okay! Let’s emphasize that. It is okay if you have not achieved certain goals. Right now let go of any pressure connected to that. If somewhere along the way you stumbled, took a wrong turn or made an unwise decision, it’s okay! It does not mean you cannot or will not make progress towards those goals in the future. History is not destiny.
An honest self-assessment will tell you the most valuable thing you need to know. Ask yourself right now, “Where am I?” “What am I?” and most importantly “Who am I?”
It may help at this time to be specific in your questions. For example, “Who am I to my parents or my spouse? What is my role to my friends? Where am I in relationship to my coworkers?”
Once these questions have answers you now have a point on your personal map. You now know where you are on your path. You can see what direction you have been going.
Remember, the map is not the territory. Allow me to illustrate this point. I have always wanted to go to Paris. I want to see the museums and artwork, the buildings and parks. I want to watch people from a sidewalk café while sipping wine. I have read books on Paris as a city, Paris travel guides, stories that take place in Paris. I have studied maps of Paris until I feel that I know my way around. My nephew however has gone to Paris and lived in France for several months. I know the map, he has walked the territory.
Now you get to decide, “Where do I want to go? What do I want to do? Who do I want to be?”
There is no magic bullet or shortcut on this path. This will take time and energy. You must look up from the map and begin walking, take a single step. This means taking responsibility for yourself and your actions.
The best way at this point is to say to yourself “I am_____!” and fill in the blank with whatever it is that you want to be, what you choose to be. This is not anyone else’s choice; this cannot be something someone else chooses for you.
It is not what you are now, but what you will become that you want to begin defining for yourself. Words that state positives are what you are looking for here. “I am healthy” or “I am strong in my body, mind and spirit” or “I am filled with energy”, these are phrases that can start you on a successful course.
Once you begin to have positive affirmations as self-talk, you will start to see clearly what needs to be done to achieve your goals. Again, this is a process not an event. You will notice behaviors that need to be adjusted, thought processes that no longer serve you, perhaps even relationships that are not in your greatest good. You cannot change a lifetime of patterns in one day.
When we look at trying to change an entire lifetime, we can become overwhelmed before we even start. It is important to pay attention to where you are RIGHT NOW and at this point take a single step forward in the direction you want to go.
It is not a journey that you need to accomplish alone. There are many guides available in the form of books, organizations, counselors, teachers and friends. Learning when to turn to these guides and when to follow your own inner voice is part of the journey.
It is said that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Begin your journey of your lifetime today!
For personal guidance from Jeff Michaels, please see the Classes & Services page on this site.